Saturday, Mar 26, 2016, 11:13 p.m.

So i’ve been away for a few days and i’ll be honest..the will just hasn’t been there..it is one of the hardest things for me to do..motivation. Anyway..i have been doing a lot of pondering life lately..since me and the wife had our little “discussion” i am trying to look at things from a new direction..i am trying to work on being happier..it is working pretty well..well…that and being hypermanic probably doesn’t hurt.:)…

It was a fun day with the family today..we had our little Easter party..it sure is more fun to be hypermanic at parties than depressed! The thing that really sucks..is..i think that my depression cycle is going to go from about October to the end of February…what is the significance of that you wonder? Well..it means that Thanksgiving..Christmas…New Years and Valentines Day…will probably always be experienced in a depressed state…excuse the french..but..that sucks SHIT!!!

I had wondered the past several years why i can never feel the holiday spirit anymore…it’s probably because i am so DAMN depressed…upon doing some research..it seems that i am not the only one this happens to…I know what you are going to say…well..not if your mentally ill…but others would say that these issues happen to everyone during the holidays…i would agree to an extent..however..i disagree in the fact  that for most people..after the holidays..they settle back into the routine..where as…for people who are mentally ill..like me…i still get to have the fun for several more months….and add the fact that i don’t want to live too much during those times…yah..i would say..mentally ill people have it a lot worse…Sorry you quote/unquote..”normal people”!…we got you beat..:(

With all that said…Happy Easter everyone..may Heavens light shine brightly before you…..

Cheers

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Saturday, Mar 26, 2016, 11:13 p.m.

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